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Bully Syndrome; The Adult Woman Who Degrades A Child

Bully Syndrome is a chronic disease. This is a disease which is a mental condition created by a broken mind, jealousy, and poor self-esteem. This is a disease where one enjoys the misfortune of others, attempting to create the persona of being better, more accomplished, and well-adjusted in their lives. It is a disease that distorts the truth and makes the bully tell one lie after another for their own benefit. A disease which makes the lies into truths in their own minds. A disease which also keeps the made-up stories as "real truth" in their sick minds.

My adult woman bully makes sick jokes about my son, on public internet, who she believes is and calls "bastard". In fact, the word "bastard" is in full caps (BASTARD) as she describes my son and me, as his mother. She, herself, bore a child out of wedlock but refuses to call her child the same horrible word. Of course, and as usual, she has validation of such. Her child cannot be as it was conceived in love. But so was mine! It was a mis-guided love at the time, but it was love.

My "bastard" son has grown into a man rich with family and love. He protects his mother at all costs and refuses to answer to a woman who is nothing more than a gossip and toxic woman. His many visits into our home with his wife and child make life wonderful and memorable. His father denied the existence of my son until many years later when the State made him succumb to a blood test by court order. He was charged back and current child support. At the time, he was married with three children of his own and began reluctant visitation with a son elated to finally get a chance to know his father. His father, step-mother, and step brother and sisters were not kind to him yet he took their abuse with a smile and good attitude. When I decided to relocate to the State of Virginia with my husband, my son wanted to stay with his father. He was desperately wanting this relationship to work. Because my handsome son would be staying with his father, I signed off over $16,000 in back child support so that his father's family would not suffer from this financial burden. I never relinquished custody, my son was never legally taken from me; we had joint custody with primary residence given to my son's father at that time. My son returned to me just a little over a year later, crushed at the attitude of his father towards him. His father making up stories of bad behavior and contempt for the child. We found out later it was the children of his own family that were making my son fight a losing battle to win his father's attention. One story was of his father smoking marijuana and giving it to all of his children; illegal and under-age. My son graduated from high school with honors, has gone to college, and has worked hard to become a supervisor in a healthcare company. He has nothing to do with his father and calls my husband "dad". The man who took him in and taught him how to be a good man, proficient in mechanics and encouraging good grades. The man not his biological father. He credits my husband and I for standing with him in his struggles of faith and family. He has loved me unconditionally. My son is full of love and service, he loves his child and involved in all of her activities. He treats with wife with love and respect as I would want him and trained him to be. He is God-fearing, prays and read scripture daily, and works faithfully in his church alongside others. He is not at fault as to how he was conceived; he just needs to know how loved and appreciated he his as all children need in their lives.

I have never gone back and asked for the child support that is owed to me. I still can and maybe I should. This would cause truth to unfold! Why cause further grief and pain when guilt will eat up this man one day. After all, the man that could not be father has been married and divorced several times since this has all happened. He cannot support himself or a family. Maybe I should tell how this person was returned from a Mormon mission for attending a concert and having sex with women while professing love of faith and religion?! But this is a world of second chances and down-and-out stories, isn't it? The dirty secrets of those gossiping could no longer be kept secret. Well, for most of us with exception of those inflicted with Bully Syndrome.

My adult woman bully did not offer these truths in her story of slander because it would not be of interest. One cold, heartless, and cruel person obviously sickened with "bully syndrome" has to exaggerate and lie to have a following. Of course, she has her "army" of persons that believe what they are telling her is truth when in fact some of it might be but most is being found out to be false. Of course, she has not admitted on public internet how she lost custody of two of her children to mental illness. Of course, she has validation for this as usual while others are wicked in the course of parenting their own children.

I am no longer ashamed of my past as I will share. Because, our God is not only the God of second chances; He is the God of another chance. This is good news for me because I seem to mess up but less frequently than before. This is an amazing facet of God's character! His incredible patience with us! Psalm 86:15 says it well: "But you, Lord, are a God Mericiful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness." Micah 7:18 states, "Who is a God like you, pardoning iniquity and passing over transgression for the remnant of his inheritance? He does not retain his anger forever, because he delights in steadfast love." Steadfast love! This is the love that I have for my son. Unconditional love that has overcome even "Bully Syndrome".