Mean girls grow up to be mean women ...
Of course, it happens when you least expect it. The painful words, slaying phrases that can hurt deeply. This can be done in person or strewn across the million miles we call the internet causing harm and frustration. This is female relational aggression (RA); the subtle art of emotional devastation that takes place every day at home, at work, in a community setting, or on the internet. Unlike openly aggressive men, women learn early to go undercover with these assaults, often catching their victims unaware. Many carry this behavior into adulthood as we have found our woman bully to have done and is still doing.
Some women never outgrow these behaviors. The mean girls of high school carry on into adulthood to interact in aggressive ways and jockey for social status among the army of miserable persons that will hang on every word and believe every mistruth spoken. After such encounters with our adult bully, the sudden surprise of the telephone calls talking about openly using our names and experiences to further the cause of aggression and malicious harm, I reflected upon what was her motive. It obviously wasn't charm! Oh wait, it was the man that she continues to pine for and who won't commit to her even though she lives with another man. She sought to "take him away" while helping to further our own truths about what was really happening. Her sense of right and wrong validated by a minister's license from the internet and interruptions from the bible of moral values not lived. She lives in the deceptions created in her own mind that cause her to lash out in anger. We are now used to this and her exploits of being a victim. Even the supposed suicide provided insight into how low she would go to make a point of being a victim drawing others into her sick scheme. As a woman bully, she demonstrates the victim role perfectly. She is aware of her abilities to play the role and is truly afraid to be her own person.
Evolutionary psychologists explain that women are not violent by nature. Aggression between women occurs as a genetic, protective drive which can be misconstrued as being in control. However, our bully is no longer in control. We do not care what is on the internet, what is said, or her miserable army of misfits which includes woman beaters, physical and sexual assaults upon children, and felony records. She herself preyed on an elderly man, taking nearly all of his monies before being caught. Yet, she is "perfect" and always tells the truth. We are grateful for an attorney who believed in us and the movement forward for new adventures in the courtroom which will, once again, prove that all is not right with what she believes to be truth.