The truth .. Bullies, especially adult bullies, need constant chaos. Within this chaos, there is a mob setting. The bully, especially the one in our case, needs the mob to reject, mock, feed her ego, continue the escalation of drama and the cycling of gossip and filth. I had to laugh as she drags their opinions into her fold because, I am sure, if there were something positive to say about her victim, she would thrash out at the member of her mob even if the truth was told. How scary and sad is this?!
The adult bully seeks to isolate and remove support from the targeted. The more people that can be brought into the mob and help her isolate and punish the person she resents, even better! Isolation is part of the bully's consequences and a mob simply helps to make it happen on a larger scale. Our adult bully thrives on sarcasm and slander. She cannot function without some sort of degrading and vile comment towards my family and I.
Everyone in our lives serves a purpose, even our adult bully. Everyone in our life has something to teach us. While people who are kind and friendly help teach you who you do want to be, there are those who are not kind and friendly. They teach us who we do not want to be. When we encounter someone who hurts our feelings, we need to learn to lean into that feeling. Ask yourself; what did they do to make you feel that way? Was it the words they chose? Their tone? Their slandering on the internet? The way that they pick and choose what truths or exaggerations they want to embelish? The way that they exaggerate and make-up stories? They will profess that they are stronger, more in control, sarcastic, and condescending. They cannot stand alone as one person and this interrupts into being just a plain coward. Today I laughed at the involved coward who cannot tell the truth when presented with the truth. Of course, misery loves company and one has to consider the source.
Let's take the pledge!! Promise yourself that you will never be unkind to anyone or use a mob to carry out negativity against another person. I know how it feels to be treated the way I have. The abuse continues with us but we have come to accept that it is just a part of our lives that chooses to never go away. We can learn from their mistakes as well as ours. This is how we become more compassionate and loving.
When you meet someone that makes you feel good, lean into that feeling. Introduce them to the pledge. Regardless of how a person or a mob treats me, I stand to benefit from it. We can be provided with powerful and memorable lessons on the social graces, human dignity, and the importance of acting with integrity. In our world of hurts and pain already, we need to pledge to stop the hurt rather an perpetuate it. We need to pledge to be the change that we would like to see; turning the negatives into the positives. Hurtful words can be thrown like confetti, quick judgments are made in a couple of keystrokes, word pain can cut deep and when resolution is not even close to happening, we could pause for a moment and ask ourselves, "what is the person here to teach me?". From a painful experience can become a pledge which in turn can ignite hope for others who are experiencing the same kind of pain and giving hope to all of humanity.