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Just A Chapter

With integrity, you have nothing to fear, since you have nothing to hide.

With integrity, you will do the right thing, so you will have not guilt.

~ Zig Ziglar

What a beautiful morning!! The sun is shining with a few gray clouds and the air is cool and crisp. My husband and I fed the animals and I was off to get ready for work. Today, I celebrate the birthday of my son who passed away in 2010. This is a bittersweet day as emotions rock from happy to sad and back to happy again. This is also an amazing day because a sweet foal was born just after midnight; a little painted boy. I will name him after Derek in some way. Blessings among the pain. This is the way life is.

Today, I am closing another chapter. You see, I have been stalked, teased, and taunted for years. This woman is suffering from delusions and pain. I prayed for her this morning as I always do because her heart is hard and revenge has consumed her. She cannot believe that I have moved forward and accomplished much despite the pain that she has chosen to inflict.

What motivates a person to be so hurtful and unkind? There are high level feelings usually called emotions that the brain creates based on past experiences and personal preferences (ones that we can be active in controlling and changing). There are low level feelings that are primal and hard-wired for survival. I have learned from college classes that psychopaths do not create high level feelings because that part of their brain is inactive. They do feel other things like pain, hunger, and activities, like breathing, that the brains uses to keep us alive. Psychopaths are not suicidal even though they may attempt to do so to create attention and self-pity.

Most of the way psychopaths behave is learned from childhood interactions. Those who are abused see the world as a dangerous place and act out violently. We understand this plight of our stalker as she claims she has been raped and abused since birth. We have to understand this as part of the trauma she uses to attack us. Whatever sins I have done are mine alone but she makes sure that she tells everyone she can. She does not like to admit her own. Typical psychopathic behavior.

I am sure we all have someone like this in our lives. It is our reaction to them that is important! Ours involved a court case which we won but we know that the abuse from her will continue. Her words in her public posts are nonsense. Typical of someone with scattered thoughts and evil intentions. We understand her to be arrogant, dishonest, and callous. She experiences little remorse, she minimizes self-blame, exploits people, and exhibits shallow affect. It is difficult for her to live in reality.

We know that we cannot escape daily interaction with our stalker because she posts publicly and talks about us excessively. We understand why she does this and why she seems to think she needs to. Toxic persons can be mentally draining. Be proactive in taking care of yourself and manage stress! I take daily hikes with my dogs or ride one of my horses in the mountains behind our property. Find a happy place!!