Shared family secrets are pieces of information known within the family but forbidden to outsiders. Some of these pieces of information, as in the case of family traditions and inside jokes, actually increase closeness and cohesion by creating an internal culture that feels special. That said, shared family secrets are also more likely to center on taboo topics, such as abuse within the family, a family member’s incarceration, or the presence of alcoholism. My mother was a good person for this kind of behavior and as I study more in school, the more apparent this behavior is to me. My secrets were always revealed publicly but the secrets of my brothers always kept hush-hush with threats to me if they were revealed. Perhaps it is time for them to be revealed!
This past week has been amazing! An incredible new opportunity with amazing people! You see, resilience is an phenomenal characteristic and I have it. My sister-in-law did not succeed in her anger and betrayal. In fact, the opposite has happened. In fact, her actions will be her own demise. She has been caught in lies and soon all will be revealed. People cite many reasons for maintaining family secrets, including not telling the whole truths, protecting their own families from judgment, dealing with possible consequences, and privacy. These secrets create a boundary between the family and the outside world. They many pressure individual family members to limit their outside relationships to protect the secret getting out. Family members feel trapped by the secret and struggle to create close ties outside the family.
Truth be known, I have been the black sheep or the family member to internalize the shame for many years. My mistakes have been publicly made known and caused heartache and a devastation of a dream. How happy I am that the employment made ALL names known and an employment attorney can now take action. But no loss on my part as I have landed an incredible opportunity and movement forward like I could never have imagined.
In keeping the family secrets, be sure to journal everything. Even if it seems unimportant. The time has come for revelation because FULL truth needs to be known.
Thank you, dear sister-in-law and other cowards/stalkers! Your plan of demise didn't work but consequences will be great! But I love you and will always wish you the best. I will pray for your healing!
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